tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53197501762735079062024-03-04T21:13:43.200-08:00Married...with KittensNot-so-newly wed anymore. Still basically clueless.ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.comBlogger207125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-15201148302901675892012-03-06T21:21:00.000-08:002012-03-06T21:27:35.079-08:00Show people dying
Sure, I frequent a lot of "cool" wedding sites. That doesn't mean I don't heartily enjoy a little fuck you every now and then.
Found via a facebook friend. Imagined via the brains of Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein
MWKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10978782691517159565noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-8485977105496631552012-03-01T18:20:00.000-08:002012-03-01T18:20:05.026-08:00No Strings
Guess who got his cast off last week?
Hint: he's freaking impossible to photograph.
MWKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10978782691517159565noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-82789474634021256352012-01-31T20:26:00.000-08:002012-01-31T20:34:53.831-08:00Extreme Sloth LoveI've never really given two hoots about Kristen Bell, but after this video I'm pretty sure that we are soul mates.p.s. Want to know more about sloths? This handy informational video has lots of facts.p.p.s. That is a lieMWKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10978782691517159565noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-41857044173876511412012-01-24T21:10:00.000-08:002012-01-24T21:18:14.952-08:00True Life: Nashville EditionIt is 9 pm on a Tuesday night. D$ and I are perusing old John Prine videos. You know, like you do. MWK: Wait, that's what Steve Goodman looks like? He looks like such a goober!D$: What you are looking at -that right there - is exactly what it is like to grow up in Nashville. It is an endless supply of people who look like goobers who are incredible fucking musicians. So. Now you know. MWKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10978782691517159565noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-50323627510740596772012-01-18T07:36:00.000-08:002012-01-18T07:40:31.222-08:00Convos at Our House: Snow Day editionMWK: So is it still actively snowing?D$: What? What would passively snowing look like?MWK (sighing): What I want to know is: is there snow falling from the sky?D$: I don't know where else snow would fall from.pauseMWK (growling): I'm gonna make snow fall from somewhere else.D$: How?MWK: Violently.MWKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10978782691517159565noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-11980469816763876512012-01-14T07:00:00.000-08:002012-01-14T07:00:05.869-08:00Don't call meIt turns out that I am total shit in emergencies.
Well, to be fair, I did cling to Fester like a boss when he emerged from his carrier screaming and covered in piss. Despite the fact that I was wearing a very loved shirt and scarf (how fucking dumb was that) I clung to that pee-covered squaller like he was the greased up boy-gnome from The Gnome-mobile.* So that was pretty good.
But as ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-66447044499963448852012-01-12T19:56:00.000-08:002012-01-12T19:56:10.784-08:00Still got it!
Not even a debilitating cast can stop this one-legged poop machine.
Yes, his cast leg is up on the side of the box.
ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-86678186875449244862012-01-01T20:39:00.000-08:002012-01-01T20:39:26.685-08:00In the clink
The crime: unauthorized base jumping
The time: 8 weeks
Uncle Fester is home with us. His hind leg is still intact and wrapped in a hefty cast. I wouldn't say he's happy, but he's already asking for head rubs.
Thanks are due to you and the powers of internet kitties everywhere.
ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-6942321364052469162011-12-31T00:01:00.000-08:002011-12-31T00:01:51.283-08:00Kitten emergency (not the good kind)
Uncle Fester helping D$ with a little plumbing problem we had earlier this week
Uncle Fester is at a kitty hospital right now.
We're not sure what happened. We think he tried to jump onto the ledge by our stairs*, missed, and ended up throwing himself down a half story onto the wooden steps.**
That isn't what we thought at first. Last night we came home to a cat that ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-65135918519801574072011-12-09T17:22:00.000-08:002011-12-09T17:22:26.454-08:00Dear This Week: you suck.
My step-mom's cancer is back again with a really scary prognosis
Our house closing was delayed again. And again. The move we had scheduled is not going to happen.
Brandon Roy is retiring??
Your mom, This Week. YOUR MOM. ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-67577099713605374982011-11-30T22:03:00.000-08:002011-11-30T22:03:25.683-08:00A Good Day
The summer after I turned seventeen I started volunteering once a week at a small, local nonprofit. It was a small house in a park and it served as a day space for homeless folks to get a cup of coffee, take a shower, do some laundry and meet with the Outreach workers who were working to get them into housing. I loved it so much that when school started I successfully petitioned my high school* ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-15425323593926671112011-11-08T18:32:00.000-08:002011-11-08T18:32:06.162-08:00The nervous vomsWe put another offer on a house. Then they counter-offered and we had to decide what to do about it. I ended the night scrolling through pictures of adoptable dogs on the Internet to calm myself down. Except I did not calm down and I haven't calmed down since.
This house is at the top of our budget. Slightly over it, actually. Let's break down the reasons this makes me want to nervous ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-9380696208942518542011-11-06T17:56:00.000-08:002011-11-06T17:56:50.163-08:00House Hunting and PrivilegeWhen we first started looking for houses one of the first pieces of advice we got was to write a letter to any potential sellers. Really ham it up - tell them that we look forward to raising our children in the house, send a photo of us and the cats, etc. Apparently a friend of ours - who sent a photo of himself and a pretend wife along with his letter - got a house in this manner, despite the ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-65463071745224233352011-11-01T19:22:00.000-07:002011-11-01T19:22:19.488-07:00On the hunt
Woodpiles along the street in Portland, Oregon, 1939
Dorotha Lange via the Library of Congress
So, remember how I said that D$ and I were going to try and stay still for a while? Yea, turned out to be a total lie.
We are house hunting. Have been since July. It's been a process.
First we had to have a huge fight about where to look for houses. We are committed to being in theALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-39224489183059329222011-10-31T21:47:00.000-07:002011-10-31T21:47:01.057-07:00Business Trippin'Y'all, I'm on a business trip.
As I type I am sitting in a king-size bed watching cable while browsing the internet. Earlier I used the "fitness center" and then ate dinner on the state's dime. It's fancy times over here.
Tomorrow: free raisin bran and dehydrated eggs!
ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-17600205744048820512011-10-24T21:23:00.000-07:002011-10-24T21:23:38.454-07:00Best holiday ever
Corgis in costumes.
You're welcome.ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-16218280838645450222011-10-14T09:39:00.000-07:002011-10-14T09:39:40.643-07:00Conversations at our house, Shame Edition
I come home horrified and quickly strip off my work pants.
Me (to D$): I need you to do something gross.
D$: Okay...what?
Me (hurriedly shoving the crotch of my work pants into D$'s face): Smell these and tell me what you think they smell like.
D$, without flinching, puts his face into the crotch of the outstretched pants.
D$: Oh, no...
MWK: RIGHT? But...ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-22602499353392230592011-10-07T08:33:00.000-07:002011-10-07T10:20:38.849-07:00Grind that PonyI'm gonna go ahead and quote Jezebel and tell you that you're gonna need to be canceling your plans for the rest of the day. You'll be watching Beyonce's new video on repeat and basking in its colored-leotard-high-ponytail-quad-drums dance fest.
Get More: Beyoncé, Music, More Music Videos
Sigh. I'll have to apologize to my arriving friends for not getting the house clean. They'll understand.ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-76578635580901481962011-10-05T21:27:00.000-07:002011-10-05T21:27:56.352-07:00Cue obnoxious squealing
My womens are visiting this weekend.
I am so excited I could die.
One of them is six months pregnant and the other is getting married in June. I've spent a fair amount of time in the last several months being sad about how I am missing all the good stuff. I don't know what G's favorite pregnancy snack is. I don't know if wedding planning is making L nuts.* I don't even knowALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-40540728200011031612011-10-03T22:00:00.000-07:002011-10-03T22:00:18.598-07:00Happy 19th Anniversary, Mr. President (and Ms. First Lady)
I really, really hope that President Barak and First Lady Michelle Obama are as in-love and awesome as they appear in these pictures.
But...what is happening in No. 7?
Sourcing note: The article doesn't include sources but I'm guessing they're all from White House Photographers (except the last one, of course).
ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-54495011832111731422011-09-27T21:07:00.000-07:002011-09-27T21:07:36.498-07:00Um, help?Guys, I have a very important question.
You know how you read a blog for a long time but never comment because I dunno, you are lazy or shy or a natural born lurker, but then one day you feel the drive to actually comment because you realize that is sorta how the internet community works?
Um. How do you start commenting without coming off like a weirdo? My go-to is to just to write a ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-42177791258255057072011-09-18T15:07:00.000-07:002011-09-18T15:07:34.636-07:00My seasonDeception Pass State Park, by D$
It's been wet and grey here in Portland this weekend, and I am blissful.
Autumn has arrived, bringing me peace.
It drizzled all day yesterday and is drizzling today. Leaves adorn the sidewalks and the air smells fresh. The city is cleaning itself and I am cleansed as well. Saturday morning, awaking to rain, I felt my body and soul sighing in relief. I ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-28376183391569260652011-09-12T20:33:00.000-07:002011-09-12T20:33:13.038-07:00Something to keep in mind
If you're not
If you're not
If you're not
If you're not
If you're not getting happier as you get older
Than you're fucking up
Thanks, Ani.
(Ani DiFranco opened up for John Prine (!!) at the show I saw this weekend. I was never a huge fan but she was awesome. My mom was totally enamoured with her. My Catholic mother-in-law was less thrilled with the song about promiscuity. ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-67837908439639451732011-09-07T21:36:00.000-07:002011-09-07T21:36:33.128-07:00A deep thoughtD$ and I have been together for over six years and married for over two years.
Yet, I still have (and regularly wear*) underwear that I distinctly remember other men complimenting.
What does this make me? Slutty? Thrifty? A hoarder?
*As in: was wearing a pair today and thought of said man, and said encounter, every time I went pee. Which was many times. ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5319750176273507906.post-28796112991018790072011-08-29T04:00:00.000-07:002011-08-29T04:00:03.366-07:00Vacation interludeYou know how some people go on vacation and schedule guest posts from their awesome bloggy friends so that people don't lose interest in their blogs while they are gone?
Well. I go on vacation and while on vacation I guest post on other people's blogs while ignoring my own blog just as much as I normally do. It's a special skill I have. I like to call it "doing things backwards."
Which is to ALPhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05098729708314853961noreply@blogger.com2